Cruiserisms

Part of The Underway Gourmet by Suzy O'Keefe

Cruisers are folks just like you and I... from all walks of life and all ages. And there are as many different types of boats as grains of sand on the beach. As diverse as cruisers are, they all have one thing in common... they've all given up something important in order to cruise! They've learned how to do things and how NOT to do things. Some lessons not so easily learned!!!

Here are some profound, witty, silly and just plain outrageous thoughts on the cruising life and life in general that I call "CruiserIsms".

"Problems worthy of attack
                 prove their worth by hitting back."__Piet Hein


"If your ship doesn't come in,
                 swim out to meet it."__Jonathan Winters


"Bulkhead"... Discomfort suffered by sailors who drink too much.

"Calm"... Sea condition characterized by the simultaneous disappearance of
the wind and the last cold beverage.

"Crew"... Heavy, stationary objects used on shipboard to hold down charts,
anchor cushions in place and dampen sudden movements of the boom.

"Flashlight"... Tubular metal container used on shipboard for storing dead
batteries prior to their disposal.

"Fluke"... The portion of an anchor that digs securely into the bottom,
holding the boat in place; also, any occasion when this occurs on the first
try.

"If you're looking to find the key to the Universe, I have
             some bad news and some good news.  The bad news is -- there
             is no key to the Universe.  The good news is -- it has been
             left unlocked"__Swami Beyondananda

"Wind in your hair, Salt on your lips, and Sun on your naked skin!"__


"Noserlies... When the wind comes
              from the direction your going."__Tim Tunks

Everyone has a photographic memory. Some just don't have any film!

Seen it all, done it all, can't remember most of it.

Sorry I got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory.

I let my mind wander and it didn't come back.

Mental Floss prevents Moral Decay.

If at first you DO succeed, try not to look so astonished!

Posterity is as likely to be wrong as anybody else.--Heywood Broun

"If you 'invite' me for a daysail or a trip to the Delta, chances are I'll
bring a bottle of wine or a 6 pak.  If you "need" me to be crew, I'll bring
my foulies, my binoculars, my harness, and my cookbook..."
--Suzy

The surest sign of intelligent life in the universe is that they haven't
attempted to contact us.
 --Bill Watterson

 "I wish all of you all of these as often as possible:

         One sailboat,
               two people,
               three meals,
               four watches,
               five senses on duty,
               six feet of water under the keel,
               seven winds in the sails."

 --Andrew Urbanczyk

I've given credit where I can, but many of these CruiserIsms are all but untraceable. If you know who originated any of these, please let me know ... they definately deserve the credit!